Dear Speed Seduction® Student,

In the initial phases of seduction, a little “tension” can be good.  “Give her a little of what she wants, then pull back and make her work for more” is a generalized way of putting that.

But what if you’re the kind of person who, when shown affection or appreciation, responds with higher levels of the same?  What if you do so to the point where the other person gets burned out on your presence?

This can be challenging indeed when resisting the urge to be affectionate is difficult, or otherwise no fun.

So, what to do? 

I would say, first and foremost, get a full experience of the actual physical feeling of giving affection and apreciation.

What is the feeling flow in the body?

Pour all of your attention into that, turning off the internal talk and imagery.

Every few seconds, note out loud if the feeling is the same or if it is changing.

Feelings can change in many ways: intensity, shape, duration(short bursts or long waves), direction of flow, continuous or separated by patches of empty or much lesser intensity.

Do that for a couple of minutes.

This will give you great awareness so that when the feeling/urge begins to arise you can have awareness and choice.

Also, look at how much of your desire to nurture, give affection is done because it is more comfortable than say, being commanding or aggressive or strongly sexual.

Don’t get me wrong; you can be tender and affectionate in your sexual expression too.

And, above all, look for women who will lap it up. There ARE women who want kindness and connection and safety rolled into and surrounding and perfusing through their sexual connections.

Peace and piece,
RJ

P.S. The “same and changing” technique is taught at our live seminars, along with numerous other live, interactive, get-hands-on-now demonstrations and exercises.  To get your hands on over 60 hours of this kind of teaching, instant-access, in the comfort and privacy of your home, click here.

Dear Speed Seduction® Student,

I see it happen, just all too often: one mistake can beget another.

One minute things are going well, then there’s a shift in a non-Sargy direction and everything goes downhill from there.  It’s like you fall behind then it can be a real struggle to get caught up.

Check this out: a dissection of a Sarge report from a student who found himself sliding down the slippery slope to Sargy smithereens with a chick, and didn’t even realize it until it was too late.

Stay with me for just a moment and watch how something seemingly innocuous can set the wrong frame and knock the Cape Carnal-Veral Shuttle right out of its orbital flight path.

> We agreed to meet each other sometime but she blew me off and I was content to walk away for…

RJ: Let me point out where you already went wrong: “agreeing to meet sometime” is NO agreement at all. It shows no leadership on your part and no investment on her part. Leadership on your part=investment on her part.

> a while, knowing my chance would come at some stage

RJ: No, your “chance” is only for those without SKILL. F@@k chance in the ass with a red-hot fireplace poker.  And what is this about YOUR chance? SHE is the one who is lucky to get the shot at being with YOU.

RJ: Or at least it is useful to frame it that way.

> She tells me she is taking the day off on Monday and could we do something then. I say, sure, I’ll have to check my schedule, anything in particular you feel you would really like to do?

RJ: No, no. Why are you asking HER to take the wheel? YOU ARE THE DRIVER!

> She tells me, bring me, surprise her, bring her a flower or a cake (yeah, right!) I tell her I’ll be in touch. We hug some more, later we dance together, then I kiss her goodbye and go home as the remaining guests are starting to get ready for bed.  I send her the following text message, early Sunday Afternoon:

RJ; CLUE: txt msgs sck dck and r a stp bckwrds on the intmcy ldder.

And also, this is beginning to smack of being a “date”. You already had her making out with you, right? At least a little bit? So now why “date”? No, the answer is, “let’s watch a movie. I’ll pick one funny and one adventure. ”

> Hi Gina, thanks very much for Friday, lovely evening promised to do something with you tomorrow so will pick you up around 4pm for a drink.

RJ: Pick her up? PICK HER UP? You only pick up someone whom you are going to go out and DATE. You are climbing back DOWN the intimacy ladder!

> I get this response from her: “Hey can we check in tomorrow? I have made plans to go for a walk at four and my day seems to have filled up. Really want to see this healer but if I can’t may be able to do earlier. Do you mind if we check in tomorrow? Thanks for coming on Friday ”

RJ: Translation: you got me turned on. I’ve been thinking about you sexually. But you just asked me on a “date” and now all my objections and problems with “dating” are coming up in my mind. I don’t want to date anyone right now. I want to FUCK, FUCK, FUCK.

> I mail back:

RJ: Mail? As in email? Wow, email is even LOWER on the intimacy ladder.

U rlly scrwd up bg tme.

> “Bad girl, you just lost 10 points! Monday was your suggestion after all Seriously though, I am tied up tomorrow earlier in the day so that’s not going to work for me. I am pretty much committed in the evenings for the rest of this week so tomorrow afternoon / evening is all I can offer you until next week. Just to be clear from the outset, though, I have two value requirements for any kind of relationship…

RJ: Relationship? RELATIONSHIP? Dude, she’s ready to f@@k, not date. Your old-fashioned thinking warped you right out of her bed into being a “groper” and a “lustful f@@k salesman”

> business or social: Trust and respect. Call me with pleasure if you want to see me and I will say yes because I’d like that, but don’t ever flake on me again.”

RJ: You had no firm plan. You ask her to set the lead. And now you call her a “flake”?

> Thing is, I knew she would flake, although, meeting her friends, I could see that she did manage to keep long term friendships. She is obviously used to guys fawning and taking what scraps she offers.

RJ: I wouldn’t call what you did fawning. I would call it FUMBLING.

> Note, the main challenge was the lack of opportunity to use the tools. I know she is in to me, but that doesn’t mean she’ll act on it.

RJ: She certainly won’t now.

Look: this is perhaps the worst f@@k up-no, make that SERIES of f@@k ups – I have ever seen in my 20+ years of coaching and teaching. See what happens when you begin to slide down the slippery slope to Sargy smithereens?

This is why it’s important to master the skills and set the tone early on.

Peace and piece,
RJ

P.S. A great way to avoid the pitfalls is to have me, Ross Jeffries, on-tap, 24/7, on your side and in your corner, through over 120+ laser-focused video lessons covering the seduction process, directly responding to actual student questions and challenges.  Click here to crack open the vault and claim your virtual vaginal victory now.

Dear Speed Seduction® Student,

Have you added “claim my results with the women I truly desire” to your bucket list?

If not, don’t you think it’s high time you did?  If you wait till tomorrow, the only thing that makes tomorrow different is the 1,440 minutes that will pass between now and then.

Listen to this student, who has made the decision to not let another day go to waste:

Dear Ross,

My name is Demetrius Dasilva.  I’m  38 years old from Deerfield Beach, Florida.

At 22, being an introvert, extremely shy, lacking self-confidence combined with not knowing what to say to women to be accepted made me a very lonely man and drove me to an unstoppable quest for a solution.

This goal led me to a magazine ad for Speed Seduction® and thus, I bought your paperback.

Candidly it was a tad unstructured but the message was effective and I got the gist, went on to invest in the blue book which had some fundamental patterns, then a few videos (one with the Indian guy, hehe priceless) and cds.

The more I read your material the more I realized how miserable men’s lives are without a predictable and proven technique to persuade women (also applicable to business – I’m in sales)

Obviously I kept it a secret and reaped a bountiful harvest of fresh peaches, the kind that has that smooth fuzz and heavenly scent ~wink~ not to mention the melons hehe. You can say, I became a farmer.

Inevitably I’ve developed a passion for NLP and hypnosis thanks to you as well.

Nowadays, my communication has a purpose and it’s extremely effective.

People say I’m eloquent…then I say: oh you just like my charisma honey

I also thank you for finding my princess (Paola) who I love very much. She is only 5′ but she is the most beautiful woman in the world. (Mexican + German mix)

When I met her she was 17, (I was 32) she was at the beach I drove by and called her over, started using patterns on the spot.

2 days later, still an SS beginner, I already had her going in and out of trances, it was unreal.

Her family didn’t authorize our marriage then so we waited until she turned 18 and married on her birthday. I can say I lived a fairy tale.

My baby was intoxicated with me, it was a fantastic feeling then it went to my head. (Newbies please refrain from allowing yourself to fall into this)

Unfortunately, despite loving her I started being unfaithful and obviously using my newly mastered technique on every woman who would listen.

At the same time, I started being abrasive to my wife, treating her with disrespect and because of my over confidence, I thought I’d never lose her.

Well I was wrong, 4 years into the marriage she had enough of my abuse and left me.

I’m working on getting her back and it’s now an upstream swim but it’s all my fault.

You guessed it, I’m leveraging SS again to win her back but this time I won’t hurt her because she’s the one for me.

Needless to say this is the ultimate test for me and for SS and you can rest assured you’ll be kept abreast of any progress made towards my goal. (I said “abreast” NOT breast, relax!!) Lol

My bucket list has “attend Ross Jeffries live work shop” listed on there but last time I checked you were going to be in London so…let me know when the next one is in the U.S.

Your devoted student & eternal advocate,
Demetrius “DAHOOK” Dasilva
Love you RJ, you changed my life

Peace and piece,
RJ

P.S. Demetrius is right about this: I WILL be in London, next weekend (June 24-26).  Will you spend 3 days with me, live, doing on-the-spot changework that will create your new life story of vaginal victory and tight trim triumph?  Click here and don’t miss out!

Dear Speed Seduction® Student,

Perhaps, in the past you’ve been so confused, and have screwed-up so bad with women, it boggles your own imagination.

To that I say: Welcome to the human condition.

So, then you make the decision to take massive action to improve your girl-getting game and start claiming the results you want with the women you truly desire.

As you continue to make gains in this area, you start discovering many of your false or limiting beliefs that you didn’t even know were there.

Please get this; discovering your false and limiting beliefs is 100% part of this process…..

…….And those discoveries ARE GAINS!!!

As you see what actually works with women in the world, you cannot help having your old beliefs challenged and changed.

As you change and challenge your old beliefs, you cannot help but make progress in the field.

This is one of the core and key distinctions between Speed Seduction® and all of the rip-offs, imitations and down-right bizarre mutations out there: Speed Seduction® requires you deeply re-examine how you think about women, what attracts them, and indeed, what “attraction”, “love” “desire” really are, as PROCESSES with a structure, sequence, flow, movement etc.

You can get some progress just by mindless imitation; but deep change and huge sastisfaction/suck-sess requires you change the filters and beliefs through which you address the world of women.

Why do you think I give guys tools for meditation?

So you can create ***spaciousness**** in your consciousness. Room to see your old beliefs and patterns WITHOUT BUYING BACK INTO THEM. Extract whatever useful and accurate info might be there, then move to something more fun, empowering, accurate and overall better.

And that, my friend, beats a poke in the eye.

Peace and piece,
RJ

P.S. With my Nail Your Inner Game system, you get a way to take any and all confusion, frustration, and stuckness you’ve ever experienced with women, and immediately convert it to pure, immediately usable learning, so you could bounce right back, and automatically do things right the next time.

Click here to learn more

Dear Speed Seduction® Student,

In my last blog post, I explained the reasons why women put men through B.S. tests.

So, moving right ahead, today I will share some powerful techniques to not only “pass” these tests but rather, completely overcome them and turn things to your advantage.

So, let’s delve into…

How To Handle It….Dealing From A Position Of Strength

To get back to street fighting analogies, there’s a concept from Jeet Kun Do, the fighting style of the late, great Bruce Lee that basically says that any weapon thrust your way, as part of an attack is just a convenient target to be destroyed. Coming from this perspective, an attack, rather than something to be feared, is just an unprecedented opportunity to…. KICK THE OTHER GUY’S ASS!!!!

Just so, a woman’s bullshit and tests are great opportunities to establish respect and dramatically increase her interest in you. In other words, your response to these tests, instead of being, “Oh no.…why is she doing this? What did I do wrong?”, from now on will be….

AH, HAH! A RESPECT OPPORTUNITY!!!

Look: your attitude has to be that every rude piece of behavior, every silly test of hers is just an unprecedented opportunity for you to establish respect, increase her interest, and intensify her desire to please you.

Taken from this perspective, you’ll be mentally prepared, and may even find yourself actually looking forward to her trying to pull shit, since you know it’s your chance to get her really hot for you!!!!

Now let me add one other thing: when you do put her in her place…

IT’S GOT TO COME FROM THE RIGHT PLACE IN YOU!!!

In other words, the macho idiot who loses control and trashes the place when his girlfriend comes home ten minutes late is definitely not the example to follow. All he’s doing is showing he can’t control himself and he just earns the woman’s contempt.

Notice I’m not saying you can’t or shouldn’t get a little pissed. Just don’t go nutso with a stream of obscenities. (Streams of obscenities are for afterwards, when you are in bed with her.)

The other thing that doesn’t work is acting like a hurt little boy. Whining stuff like, “How could you do this to me?” or, “But you promised!” won’t cut it, good buddy. No. You have to come from the calm, but firm “take it or leave it” position. This is all part of displaying the critically important………

WILLINGNESS TO WALK AWAY FROM HER!!!

You see, after years of experience and study, I’ve come to the conclusion that a woman can only experience real passion for you if on some level she believes she could do something to lose you!

Understand that when you show this willingness to walk away, in any area of your life, it conveys the message that you are the prize to be pursued, that you are the person of value, and they had better take advantage of the opportunity.

This is an attitude that will move you forward in any area that’s challenging you.

By way of contrast, if you show a non-stop, forever and ever devotion to her, and put up with her crap and ambivalence, then where is that tension of knowing she could lose you? Answer: nowhere!

And that’s why you get nowhere when you put up with this kind of stuff! If you’ve seen an initially hot relationship grow ice-cold, this is one big reason!!!

Peace and piece,
RJ

P.S. Ready to stop wasting your time and money HOPING that if you “pass the test” that women will like you and sleep with you?  Your golden ticket to success is waiting for you when you explore Speed Seduction® 3.0.

Dear Speed Seduction® Students And Fans,

The other day here on my blog, I delved into the difference between a woman deliberately trying to manipulate you, versus her need for safety and control by self-fractionating.

As I explained in that post, there are a few basic things that set up and create her willingness for seduction/trance etc. These factors make any patterning you do much more readily received and usually are factors you generally CAN control.

Now, recently, a few students have commented on my blog posts because they thought I was saying that sometimes, you cannot control the woman’s response. To that I would reply by beginning with: sometimes, factors that are beyond your control CAN work in your favor.

These include:

1) She happens to be among the 15% of the population that are sonambulistic; that is, she will readily accept and make real ANY set of suggestions anyone gives to her. She will sit with her doggy dinner bowl as you recite patterns word for word, go right in to trance and have exactly the responses you want. CAUTION: she also has a loose grip on reality and when she makes YOU her grip on reality, watch it when you try to get that grip to loosen.

2) You happen to match her “checklist”; you have the height, weight, looks, age range, job, status, etc. Given that, any patterning you do will be very well received.

3) She happens to be readily open and looking for whatever it is you happen to present, so it matches her perceived reality; she is looking to get laid that night, you present that opportunity in your patterns, and she jumps on it.

4) She has hidden/suppressed needs and the patterns bring those needs to the surface. You grab on to them and link them to you.

Now What If…

What if none of these factors work in your favor? 

What if she’s not suggestible to ANYTHING?  What if you don’t meet the criteria on her “checklist”?  Perhaps she’s not interested in getting laid at all, and she’s so intent on NOT getting laid she might even catch on to your patterns?  Her hidden/suppressed needs aren’t rising to the surface tonight?

Consider this:

• Despite all of the above, a woman’s current response should rarely be taken as her final answer.  More likely, she’s responding to what’s in her mind and her world AT THAT MOMENT.  That can change…in a moment.
• Why did she pull out her “checklist?” Is it because you took her on a “date” complete with dinner, movie, and a “romantic walk” in the park?  Remember: dating is what you do with women you are ALREADY sleeping with.  Also note, the checklist CAN change.
• Her looks might be hotter than her libido. Look around.  Ask yourself.  “Is she the ONLY succulent, amazing woman on the whole freaking planet???”
• Remember what I say: “Interested in the girl, invested in mastering the skills.”

Could any of the above apply?

Peace and piece,
RJ

P.S. In the Speed Seduction® Secret Training Collection, you’ll find (among other things) an entire section of exclusive video lessons on patterns, language skills, and poetry that help you when it seems you have “no control” over the result.  Not to mention actual, live demonstrations of Speed Seduction® as well as my critiques on Sarges done by students! 

Click here to get exclusive, lifetime access now and make 2011 your Vaginal Victory Year.

Dear Speed Seduction® Students And Fans,

When things don’t quite go your way…when you strike out with every woman you meet today (or all week long), when you feel hurt, it is natural to want to protect yourself.

It triggers off a “one-two-three-four” thought process…

• Why did this happen to me?
• This is ALWAYS going to happen to me.
• This ONLY happens to me.
• This happened because of something I did wrong.

The easiest way to protect yourself : don’t put yourself out there. Don’t approach any more women, ever.  Never Sarge.  When a woman throws herself at you, rather than run the risk she might not be THE ONE, just forget the possibility that it might be the best fucking lay you’ve ever had.  Rosie and her sisters are always there, anyway.  Right?

Wrong Song, Mr. Strong…

Newsflash: every person experiences fear, sorrow and hesitation and backsliding, suffering and restriction.

No need to feel bad about it, as the song says “Everybody hurts, sometime.”

Let’s see if we can oppose these lies with more neutral ideas. Let’s return you to neutrality before we aim to return you to other aspects of power.

Somewhere, somehow, you have some very vague representation of handling this better and want to find a better model for handling this.

All of the above are TRUE statements, no drama, no extra weight in that baggage.

Now, let’s tackle the lies and other less than useful things:

1. Why did this happen to me? Wrong question. Focuses your mind on what went wrong and your “failures”. Better question: what can I do to prevent this kind of thing from happening again without zapping my zest for life and openness to new adventures? If not, how can I now best view this as the worthwhile price to pay for having an open mind and life?
2. This is ALWAYS going to happen to me. Unlikely, if you learn what you need to. People can always change their feelings, that is true, but so can you. If someone can change their loving feelings for you because of your behavior then why can’t you change your negative feelings about yourself because of NEW behavior? Hmmmm… Change does and will happen. It’s how you choose to handle it. No guarantees on this rotating mudball other than naked baby in, stop breathing to leave.
3. This ONLY happens to me. Horseshit. Read “Dear Abby”. Watch Oprah. She had this guy on whose fiance called off the wedding 5 hours before it was supposed to go on. He wound up writing a book called Honeymoon with My Brother. Best thing that ever happened to him.
4. This happened because of something I did wrong. Here is a tricky one as it IS possible that some old patterns of emotional response or old patterns of behavior reared up and kept you from having the kinds of responses that would have kept you more in the drivers seat.

In which case, THIS GIRL WHO JUST DISSED YOU IS A GREAT SPIRITUAL GURU AND TEACHER HERE TO SLAP YOU AWAKE WITH THE PAIN SO YOU CAN SEE THESE PATTERNS AND RESOLVE THEM.

Look, what you did “wrong” isn’t the entire contents in the book of your life. They are just “markers” to show you what needs to be read and re-written.

ANYTHING THAT COMES UP COMES UP TO BE LEARNED FROM, HANDLED, PURIFIED, REFINED, RECYCLED, TRANSMUTED, RELEASED towards the vision of whom you everyday are more and more becoming.

So…find a place of objective, clear, grounded clarity to view what happened and find the patterns where you would like more power and choice.

Peace and piece,
RJ

P.S. Actually, I have two suggestions to help you with this, depending where you are.  One is my Nail Your Inner Game system.  The other is my classic course, Beyond Confidence.   Check them out.

Oh, and if you want to beat the one-two-three-four get them both and save 15% on today’s investment, just click here for a special discount link.