Dear Speed Seduction® Students and Fans,

A major challenge facing almost every smart man comes, at one point or another on his Seduction journey, when he is interested in a particular hottie who “runs hot and cold.”

One minute she’s all excited about getting together (giving you a chance to get her all hot and bothered and enjoy some crazy wild sex with her)… but in the blink of an eye, she cancels meetings, leaves messages at weird times when she knows you can’t answer, and then doesn’t answer or reply when you call back.

This student is currently getting his knob twisted in the wrong way by just such a woman:

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Ross, I have a bit of a problem. I have met a married woman who I made some plans with a week ago for this upcoming weekend. We were going to get together at my place on Friday afternoon and again on Sunday for the playoffs game – her treat. She said she would call to verify early in the week, and we’d go to a local club to watch the game. She said “hopefully I won’t get too nervous that someone will see me (at the game).”

Anyway, she called and left a message yesterday morning w/ no mention of our plans and said she’d call back. I called her back and left a message in the afternoon which she hasn’t returned. Obviously, we never got together.

When she was at my place once before, I was running all sorts of patterns with her and she was REALLY into it and then she got a call from her husband and got cold feet. I tried relaxing her, and did so to some extent but didn’t push the issue. Since then, we have not gotten together (she then cancelled plans we made subsequently), but this weekend seemed right b/c he was out of town and it was her idea to get together.

I want to stay out of a mindset within her of “cancelled plans” so she doesn’t continue to support this notion of me. Any suggestions on how to handle or shift this frame would be appreciated.

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Ev-ery time someone comes to me with a story like this, I start by asking one basic, important question:

“Is she the ONLY succulent, amazing woman on the whole freaking planet???”

Am I missing something here? When you were together before, she wasn’t completely available to you, especially after she got that phone call. She’s cancelled on you twice now. And you’re thinking she may be in a mindset of cancelling on you whenever?!?!?!?!

So clue me in here. Why, on earth, would you want to continue this? Do you live in downtown Sausageville where there are absolutely no available and willing hot women?

Don’t let this cheating married woman twist your faucet knob by running hot and cold. Drop her NOW. Let her husband, or some AFC, put up with her crap. You have better things (and women) to do, pal.

I permit you one cold shower, IF she’s THAT hot that you need it. But I assure you I’ve f@@ked women who put her to shame in looks, personality, and everything else.

So actually, forget the cold shower. Take a normal shower and put on your best clothes and favourite cologne that drives the women crazy. Get your Seduction a## back out in the field and find a new hottie who will twist your knob the RIGHT way and then share a HOT (in more ways than one) shower with you.

Peace and piece,

RJ

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Dear Speed Seduction® Students and Fans,

Even when you claim mastery of your girl-getting game, there are those amazing, sizzling hotties who will test your seduction skills.

Many women – even (sometimes especially) women who are attracted to you and want to be with you – freak out when things are about to progress from making-out to no-holds-barred f@@king.

Case in point: this note from my student:

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There’s this hot chick that I’m seeing. She’s 25, fab legs, tennis coach, who out of all of the women I’ve met (and slept with most) recently, I actually dig the most, and get a real buzz from spending time with her. Only difference is, she’s holding out.

She clearly is into me in a big way, calls/texts me frequently unprompted, and kisses me very passionately when she sees me. Anyway, I saw her for the third time last night. We had a great meal, I ran a few simple patterns, etc. etc.

However, when it came to the bedroom, after lots of passion, fondling, and dry humping, I went to remove her trousers, and she said she really should go. I did the “negation technique” but to no avail.

This perplexes me, because of all the women I’ve met recently have jumped into the sack within the first or second time of seeing each other.

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First, foremost, uppermost, important-most: give yourself a round of applause.

You’re meeting lots of women and from what you tell me, you’re having no problems getting what you want from women in general.

Typically, I’d ask …

“Is she the ONLY succulent, amazing woman on the whole freaking planet???”

… but you already know the answer - she isn’t.

You strike me as a man who thrives on a challenge, the opportunity to put your girl-getting game to the test and reach above the low-hanging fruit for the “big score.” Good on you!

Without requiring validation from this one woman, becoming her therapist, or spending time “figuring her out” (which is not your job as a Seduction master), here are four possibilities:

1. She’s seeing someone else or has an “emotional” attachment to someone else that she hasn’t revealed to you and feels she’d be betraying that.
2. She’s hung up on sex/intimacy and has intimacy problems.
3. She has a disease. No, I’m not kidding. Some women feel bad about getting it on when they have cootchie-rot.
4. Aunt Flo is currently visiting and you may just need to wait until the visit is over.

In the meantime, she’s clearly not the only entry in your black book. So turn the page and see what one of your other (more willing) female admirers is up to tonight.

Peace and piece,

RJ

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Dear Speed Seduction® Students and Fans,

A major theme that rears its ugly head in almost any discussion on seduction is the concern about looking “too eager” or approaching a woman with the vibe that how your day turns out depends on how she responds to you right now.

Act TOO eager and she’ll think you’re desperate and shoot you down. Act too aloof and she’ll think you hate her and she won’t go to bed with you, much less agree to meet you later in a more intimate setting. So it leaves you wondering…

… just where the h@ll is the “middle ground” here?

I just got a question from a student who poses this issue from a slightly different angle:

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Hi Ross, I have a question. If I am talking to a girl, I will be trying to get rapport with her. It seems however, that when I’m trying to get rapport with a chick, that she will detect this and then push me away. What do you think I should do in order to obtain rapport without looking like I am “hungry for rapport” if you know what I mean? You know what I mean? Without looking like I’m “trying to get in with her?”

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As Voltaire said, “If you are going to debate with me, first define your terms.”

So, what exactly do you mean by “rapport”…because I think your meaning is way off base.

I think YOU mean, “acceptance, welcoming, interest.” That you are trying to get her to show you all of these things. And that is NOT rapport at all, at least not a useful definition for Sarging.

There are plenty of useful definitions, but one I would aim at is,

“An unconscious sense of connection, trust, ease, a sense of being on a similar wavelength, a relaxed ease in each other’s presence.”

This is quite different from gaining acceptance or being welcomed into the person’s world. Just because she accepts your tubesteak into her wet, willing love canal doesn’t mean you’ve become a part of her existence.

Back in October, a student of mine got laid on the first “date” with a “super squirter chick.” He had a great time with her that night, but their next meeting (three days later) was a bust… in which he didn’t get to see… her bust.

Then, she “dried up” and flaked with a bull%$@t excuse the day before what was supposed to be their third meeting. When he used an anti-flake pattern to get her to speak her truth about the matter, she told him she enjoyed their night together but didn’t feel anything in common and saw no future with him.

When she told him this, he even agreed. During the times he was with her and they weren’t f@@king, it felt to him like he was working to make even basic conversation with her. She wasn’t the kind of woman who responded to who he is and what he gives to the world.

None of the elements of MY definition of “rapport” were in place for him with her. He chose to “exit, stage left” at this point and move on to women who were more receptive to his vibe.

In other words: despite all my student’s angst that whole week about whether she “accepted” him, it was a one-night stand. Period.

The irony is, if he had not worried so much about “building rapport” and becoming “part of her world” per se, and just focused on getting laid (since he had nothing else in common with her but the sex was awesome), he probably would have f@@ked her again… and again… and if that ran its course, possibly nailed one of her hottie friends next.

When deciding where any woman you meet fits in your world, first define your terms for approaching women and life.

Peace and piece,

RJ

P.S. Since enjoying damn near ridiculous levels of success, satisfaction and pleasure with the most amazing women around is something you are highly interested in, then investing in my Speed Seduction® 3.0 System could be one of the best things you’ve ever done.

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Dear Speed Seduction® Students and Fans,

The other day here on my blog, I delved into what to do when the woman you are trying to “close the deal” with throws ice water on your Sarging efforts by dropping the “F-bomb” as in “let’s be friends.”

This is one of the timeless challenges for many smart guys like you who claim your skills, results, and future in succeeding with the women you desire. It struck a nerve with several people who wrote to me.

Here’s an interesting question that was posed to me – what do you do when she is willing to “only go so far” but gives a (seemingly) irrational response when you try to take things further?

A student of mine asked:

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I have a problem with this woman who lives in my residence. She is sexy like a pornstar. We have made out numerous times, and also watched movies together and cuddled each other on the bed. However, she is arrogant, and when I reach lower down on her body, she screams out.

She is scatter-brained most of the time and does not focus attention on some of the Speed Seduction patterns that I employ on her. Not only that, but she does not mind flirting with all the other guys in the residence – even when it’s right in front of me.

Can you help me out on how to go further with this chick?

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Great question! She’s not quite saying “let’s just be friends” but on the other hand, she’s not exactly saying “you’re the man I want to be with” either. It’s somewhere in the middle and you’re not sure where. Let me give you some questions to ask yourself and things you need to consider.

First, foremost, uppermost, and importantmost: EV-VERY TIME someone asks me what to do in situations like these, I always ask the same question back …

“Is she the ONLY succulent, amazing woman on the whole freaking planet???”

Remember: Speed Seduction® gives you the ability to powerfully sort through the women you encounter to quickly identify the women who are most receptive to who you are and what you give to the world.

If you’re properly applying my teachings, you’re quickly doing “Exit, Stage Left” with poor-fit candidates and focusing your seduction skills on women who respond to who you are and what you put out there.

Is it ok with you that she flirts with other guys in front of you? Do you hope that she’ll cease to flirt with other guys and focus only on you? And even more, is your self-validation dependent on her forgetting all your residence mates and focusing only on you?

What is it about her, other than her sexy pornstar-like looks, that attracts you to her? There’s some issue with her that she doesn’t want to go further than making out, hence these screams when you try to touch her “down there.” To figure this out, do you propose to become her psychologist and try to “figure her out?”

Or could your girl-getting power be exerted elsewhere finding another hottie (or hotties) who will scream with orgasmic delight when you touch them “down there”?

Find the answers to these questions, and I think you’ll know how to proceed.

Peace and piece,

RJ

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