“I’m Confused And In Love With Her”

Dear Speed Seduction® Student,

So often, I get email from guys who are stuck on ONE girl.

They want to know what to do in their situation to win that ONE girl, without even realizing that there is an entire world filled with awesome, fun women, if they just knew how to reach THEM.

Then they wouldn’t be so stuck on that ONE girl.

Here is one man’s story. You are about to get some valuable insights, no matter what you current situation with women.

“Ross, I have a girl who is a ‘friend’ who I’m falling in love with. She has a boyfriend who she lives with but has been flirting with me lots over the last 4 months.

On Saturday she stayed over with some lady friends and told me she ‘had a thing about me’. She has given me so many messages to indicate a relationship.

However, I feel like a rabbit caught up in the headlights of an oncoming car. I’m paralyzed by the fact that she is living with someone and feel confused about getting drawn into her. My feelings have gotten stronger and stronger the more I see her yet I can’t seem to tell her.

How do I get rid of these feelings that feel like a drug? She indicates she’ll marry her boyfriend if he gets his job in New York yet indicates that she is not entirely happy with life with him. And then she does all this flirting with me.

I’m confused and in love with her. She’s giving me all the signals and I feel stuck.

Some RJ advice would be most welcome.”

RJ: I have some “advice” for you, but you may not want to hear what I have to say.

First of all, I can bet dollars to donuts that you have little or no experience with women. Likely this one woman is the only woman with whom you’ve had any kind of semi-intimate contact/connection for quite some time.

So the first question I ask when I read something like this is, “What are the skill sets that this person is missing in their world?”

In other words, if all the focus that went into this “crush” on this woman were to be productively applied, what skill set would this person put that energy to? What work is having this “crush” allowing this person to avoid doing?

Obviously, it’s the work of working on YOUR confidence and YOUR ability to go out and meet and attract LOTS of women.

Do you see how all of this “crushing” is distracting you from the lessons you really need to learn? And, how underneath the “love” is really the FEAR and the feeling of LACK?  That’s the first thing.

The second thing is, you say you “love” this woman, yet you don’t feel safe to share what you really think and feel with her AND you feel confused.

Well, you OUGHT to be confused because she is behaving in a CONFUSED fashion. She says she’d marry her boyfriend, but she flirts with you AND she tells you that she has a thing about you.

No wonder you don’t feel safe around her and you feel confused: her mixed messages ARE confusing. She dangles the bait and then YANKS it away by talking about wanting to marry her boyfriend.

In other words, she’s fractionating you. Giving you some, then taking it back, then giving it again.



P.S. Meet me back here tomorrow where I show you how to finally nail a chick who does stuff like this. Stud or dud or in between, you WILL learn something from this!

P.P.S. This can shake the mind/state of even an experienced, confident guy if he isn’t prepared to handle it. Imagine how it affects a guy without experience.  Speed Seduction® shows you how to break through slumps, dumps, and humps WITHOUT pushing through pain.


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4 Responses to “I’m Confused And In Love With Her”

  1. Joseph K says:

    Recently, I looked over a website which featured a recent high school reunion of mine out of curiousity. What I found out later on was that some of these people were divorced, several doctors were divorced, another guy had a criminal conviction for violating a restraining order by his ex. I was at my class high school reunion a while ago (big mistake never again) and rememember the former HS quarterback was there with his hot girlfriend. What I found out later was that he wasn’t at this latest reunion because he mysteriously died in his sleep leaving behind a wife and kids and a VP position at a bank …so much for the “american dream”

    The point of the educational system for the most part isn’t to get people to want learn passionately, but to condition people to submit to an artificial authority figure, to segregate men and women into roles that suit soceities needs (that is a why men and women in general stick to themselves in bars etc), to support cliques and social hierarchy ,and to create various ranked groups based on “intelligence” to channel people into various professions (there is a reason why the USMC recruiter goes after people with school labeled lower intelligence and other people go onto college). I have learned far more from the internet and college (to a lesser extent) than what I learned in the “educational” system.

    Having said that, why would someone want to go back to potentially give rebirth to all those pathological anchors? Do survivors of
    Auschwitz go back for a reunion?

    I doubt it…

  2. raj says:

    When one looks between the lines as RJ has just done all the inaccuracies point back at you and so just changing the direction of all that energy and focus on them allows one to align themselves to the actual flow of the experience and actually learn what they need more easily.

  3. A M says:

    WOOOW!!! She is the only one so he could go and meet tons of gorgeous models with a no care attitude, isn’t the oneitis curse amazing?

  4. Pingback: How To Finally Nail That Boyfriend-Loving, Tallywacker-Teasing TartRoss Jeffries Uncensored

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