Dear Speed Seduction Students,
Wow. Just wow. You are really giving me some great stories about your own crazy chick encounters.

Please know that I read each comment and respond to each one. And I’ll pick a winner for “Craziest Chick Story” soon.

Now, as promised, here is MY crazy chick story.

About 10 years ago I met this chick at a party.  She was a bit wary of me, but after I literally walked away from her, she wound up running after me, outside the party, and handing me her number. (Was this the first hint?)

Cut to about 4 days later. She’s over at my place. I give her the art tour of my place, pointing out the various comic art, etc.

We go to my bedroom and I show her a painting done by one of my friends at the time; it’s Eve right after she took a bite of the apple.  She seems unusually fixated on it, but I thought nothing of it(Warning sign number two?)

She notices a book on my book shelf about remote viewing, and asks if she can borrow it.  “Ok,” I think. “No big deal”. So I lend it to her.

We wind up doing the nasty thing, she leaves my place, and that’s that. Or so I think.

About a week later I get a Hannukah card from her. It basically says how happy she was to meet me, what a great night she had, and Happy Hannukah to me and my cat.

It Gets Super-Werid HERE!

So I’m sitting at California Pizza Kitchen when I get a call from Nutso.  She says, “I just wanted to tell you that I only sent you that card to wish you Happy Hannukah and NO OTHER REASON(shouting this last bit with quite some anger).

Ah…say what?

“Ok….” I manage to stammer.

Then she drops the bomb

“I want to ask you a question. I want to know and I want the truth. Are….you…a….remote…viewer?”

(Pause here for a second: “remote viewing” allegedly involves the psychic act of mentally tapping into a “target” and describing information about the target, usually by sketching what the viewer sees . Google it!)

“Uh…no” I reply “Why?”

“Because I have your book that you lent me and I think you ARE a remote viewer. And I think you are part of the harrassment progrgam and you KNOW IT!”(Screaming that last part so loud the person sitting next to me heard it through my phone’s earpiece and turned to look at me!)

But she wasn’t done.

“That painting on the wall in your room?  Every night since my trip to Mexico where those two men who wait outside my house and follow me to work first met me, I have that electronic buzzing in my head that wakes me up. And the night before I met you at that party, the buzzing woke me up and I saw a holographic image of that painting, projected in the air in front of me. SO I KNOW IT IS YOU!”

Heard enough?

This dinged-damsel procedes to tell me that she is going to sue me, sue my “masters at the CIA”, etc etc.

My response? “Lady, you are fucking crazy.  CRAZY. Get help. Professional help. And never call me again.”

Can you believe it?

What do you think? Can you top this?

Peace and piece,

RJ

P.S. 6 months later I get my book back the mail, with a lovely “thank you note” telling me how much she enjoyed meeting me and inviting me to coffee! YOWWWWWSA! NUTTEEEEEE!!!!