Dear Speed Seduction® Student,
In honor of yesterday being June 9 (6/9), I’m going to get into a type of positioning.
Not the missionary, piledriver, 69, doggystyle, reverse cowgirl. I mean, positioning in terms of sharing your rules and values with a woman you’re Sarging, seeing, or in a relationship with.
For example, one of my students has three main values he adheres to and expects the women in his life to also adhere to:
- Don’t ever lie to me
- When you say you’re going to do something, keep your word and do it
- You have to be moving up or moving positive if we’re going to spend time together
While you’d think these are just basic Goddamn common courtesy, all too often you actually have to explain this to someone.
Sometimes sharing your rules can mean feeling a bit vulnerable, especially if you show a bit of genuine anger.
But it CAN (read: MIGHT) create the chance for the other person to feel free to be vulnerable.
This all depends. How well do you know the person? How bad is the behavior?
Back when I was single I had a woman flake on me at the last minute after she and I had hung out a couple of times. It REALLY pissed me off.
So after a few days, I got her on the phone and calmly but with a bit of pissed off going as well, I strongly told her my rules about friends not flaking at the last minute; that I expected friends to respect and appreciate the gift of my time, that she had thrown a major monkey wrench into the process of our getting to know each other, and that it was up to her to pull it out.
She called back, I let voice mail take it. She angrily defended herself, admitted she had also done wrong etc.
I called her back, she answered, apologizing, saying I was right. I let her know that she would have to make it up to me.
You know, sometimes I think women do things to piss us off just to see if we will own our position and show some genuine anger. It’s not so much a “shit” test as a “trust” test.
They’ve been lied to a zillion times before by guys sweet talking them, telling them what they want to hear. What guy would THINK that they(women) WANT to hear anger? No guy would think that, so since you are showing anger, you MUST be sincere. You are being honest.
As long as the anger is not expressed with an attack, like “You rude fucking bitch. What a thoughtless idiot you are!”
The anger has to express what YOUR rules are, how she violated it and what YOU expect.
Be careful, however. Some women want you to get angry because THEY are angry and want a good match.
Peace and piece,
RJ
P.S. A great next step forward: learn how to show her that you’re the alpha male that can satisfy her in the bedroom without using any words. That’s just one of many, many vaginally-victorious teachings you’ll find inside Speed Seduction® 3.0.
You know what Ross?
Although this one wasn’t about sex/how to attract/how to seduce etc… I really belive that this newletter is one of your best.
Because you are explaining here something so basic and important in any relationship. And the guys who are smart enough to actualy apply this basic concept will be much more succesful in thier relationship with women.
When you dont afraid to be honset with a woman, when you are not afraid to say what is REALLY on your mind, (as long as you dont hurt her) things will be alot more easy and simple with the ladies.
Yeah, like it is so much about connecting in EVERY way; not just with the easy fun stuff. Like, I had this final exam. I told a friend not to wake me up. She calls me up in the middle of the night and starts blabbing about some wonderful guy she met. I was pissed and showed her a side of myself she hadn’t even imagined. The next day she was taking me around introducing me to all her friends. My new girl friend.
This is absolutely right.
If someone needs more reasons to do so should read “radical honesty”
that’s a good point and true. I was seeing a girl who would purposely fire me up to see where I was at with my rules and I held firm (they were almost like the ones posted). I held firm and told her, I have no problem walking away if you aren’t going to respect them. She’d fall in line once the conversation was done.
It would get heated, but I never ever do a personal attack in a fight and I will never argue when drinking. I always tell them, I have no problem discussing this but not while we’re are drinking. Of course they are more pissed of then, but 100% of time they thank me for it in the morning and all the accolades that go with it.
Great Topic RJ.
B
O.k. then riddle me this: what if she flakes in the bedroom? takes me to her room with lights& tv off and blinds closed w door shut then we embrace and just as i really move in she pushes me away w her finger!?
Should I have really just seriously told her off? Instead, I merely said “what did u expect inviting me IN like that” and she had the nerves to respond by saying i am making it hard for us to hang out and that i am starting to be “creepy” to her…huh?!
..was she testing my anger, teasing, or what?
[…] In previous posts here on Ross Jeffries Uncensored, I’ve explained the importance of clearly positioning your values. […]