Dear Speed Seduction® Student,
All things aside, are you, as the gentleman, still obligated to pay for the lady’s drink?
Let’s dig into this.
So you’re at a social with a cash bar (and you can run a tab). You’re just having fun, being playful, chatting up different women. Then, you focus in on one woman, and vice-versa. You approach her.
She seems attractive and bright. She’s been drinking a bit, not too much and not surprisingly since this is a social with a cash bar, but just enough for a slight buzz.
You say and do Sargy things and the seduction seem to be progressing nicely. This night just might have an Act 2 – a torrid, steaming-hot sex scene.
At the end of the night, it’s time to pay the tab. You pay yours. She starts complaining that her friend had invited her, implying that she doesn’t want to pay her own tab. You assume she wants her friend to pay. Remembering how “booze” is one of the 5 Bs that desperate supplicators resort to, you don’t volunteer to pay. Eventually, her friend comes back to where you are and pays the tab.
Outside in the parking lot, she puts you to the fire for not offering to pay for her drinks. Maybe you should have expected this. (Thank you VERY much, social programming and Romance Racketeers, for f@@king things up AGAIN for both you and her.)
Now, she seems like an attractive enough woman that most other guys would offer to pay for her drinks. Instinctively you sense this might be the turning point that determines whether you a) go home with her, b) go back out Sarging, c) call it a night. So what do you do?
A student of mine, when faced with this exact scenario, told her, pleasantly but matter-of-factly, “I’m not going to buy your affections.” It became clear she wasn’t going to give him her number, much less a ride on the O-Train, so he did the ol “Exit, stage left.”
I think he did fine. I would have suggested he say, also, “Do you really need the external validation of a guy’s buying things for you, to be reminded of your own value and worth?” Then shake his head and walk off.
Peace and piece,
P.S. Are you ready to stop wasting your money buying drinks at bars or clubs hoping that will get women to like and sleep with you, or taking women on expensive dinner dates hoping that’ll get them in your bed? Then it’s time you explore Speed Seduction® 3.0.