Dear Speed Seduction® Student,
Yesterday I shared with you Part 1 of the letter from my student who set the intention of approaching 100 women and the expectation that most of them would shoot him down.
In Part 2, let’s explore some of the techniques that helped him in his quest.
As you read the rest of his letter, pay special attention to his brilliant advice on overcoming the fear of “failure”.
Now here’re a few techniques you may want to use:
Talking with other smart guys about women: I cannot say enough about this. Just learning what others are doing while doing the above is both encouraging as well as enlightening. I just want to thank the thoughtful people who post quality emails … some of us really appreciate it.
Self-reward and -analysis: Always pat yourself in the back after making an approach or every few approaches. It works. It sounds funny but you feel better when you tell yourself ‘good job’ and give yourself a pat in the back.
Every, say 5 approaches analyze what you did… think how you could have done it concretely better… and replay in your mind how you’d have done it. DON’T analyze every time, do it every say 5 times.
Women are random and if you analyze it each time you’ll NOT see the real pattern. No pun intended. 🙂 But the exercise (AGAIN) is not to get better, although you naturally will, but just to get across the X number of getting shot-down.
Fear of failure and safety: Early on I sat down and asked myself what in the world was holding me back from approaching beautiful (physically, intellectually, spiritually) women and making their lives sheer beauty, wonder, delight… and I realized… it was just a simple fear of failing.
What if I make a fool out of myself? What if I fall on my face? What if I just annoy her? Being someone who’s successful at a lot of things he’s tried in life this was a BIG one.
But then after some thought I realized it was a paradox. THE BIGGEST FAILURE IS TO FEAR FAILURE. If you fear failure, then you’re GUARANTEED to fail every time.
Think about it. Think about this for long enough and it’ll BLOW your mind AND any fear of failure you have out of the water. DRILL on any such feelings with this paradox.
If you fear failure, YOU WILL FAIL EACH AND EVERY TIME. It’s a complete guarantee. So THAT FEAR IS ITSELF the BIGGEST FAILURE.
Secondly, often we want to be ‘safe.’ But usually, safe from what?? Safe from success, safe from learning how to move women in ways that may astonish us. Do you want to be safe from success? Really? Think about your whole life … do you want to be safe repeating that SAME pattern?
If these are issues for you, I’d try meditate on these two ideas, after some breathing exercises, and you may find, like I did, that meditation affecting your whole life timeline, going to the deepest crevices of your being, and you will be decontaminated from those thoughts in a couple hours or days.
Don’t be surprised to see your whole physiology changing. This is not just pattern language… my whole body felt it. Use the titanium drill of the paradoxes to destroy those filthy mental microbes.
Best regards, Stephen/Angelo
Ok. Ross here again. This student really got it when he talked about the paradox of fearing failure actually being the biggest guarantee of failure.
You see, as I have said before, it is the meaning you assign to things that determines how you will feel about them. If you assign the meaning that you MUST “succeed” with every beautiful girl you see, you are going to drive yourself nuts with all sorts of unneeded fear and stress.
When you assign the right meaning to things; that you are just practicing and you are intending to fall on your face, just to practice, suddenly it loses its importance and paradoxically, you do a lot better with a lot less effort.
My own personal beliefs about meeting and seducing women are, “Let’s go have some fun with her and find out what she’s like” and “I will either get what I want or learn what I need to in order to get what I want or even better next time”.
Try THOSE on for size, and see what happens to any fear of approaching women.
Peace and piece,
RJ
P.S. Ready to claim 2011 as your Vaginal Victory Year? Inside the Speed Seduction® Secret Training Collection you will find over 120 tightly focused, girl-pulling video lessons, including an entire segment on “Blasting Through Stuck Points” – and much much more. Click here to claim your lifetime, instant online access now.
“Think about your whole life … do you want to be safe repeating that SAME pattern’
yes in front of your 55 inch palsma tv putting you into a transe of safety, comfort and …sleep
When I meet a women and start talking to her I try to be her friend. If you go for friendship first it takes alot of pressure off of you and you get to know her as a friend first and figure out if I want to take it to the next level. The women is more relaxed around you too. And if they really like you they’ ll let you know. Works for me!
@Eddie
You’re joking, right?
Ross, been studying your stuff for the last two years. It works great. The confidence it gives you is the key. I go into a store and get playful and get so many responses it’s beyond belief. I just had my 49th B-day, but still look good, but, I’ve had the best luck with women in their late twenties. They are a lot more playful than a women of my age. Besides that, they are a HELL of lot BETTER LOOKING!!!
Yep…late twenties, 27-28, just perfect for us old farts…or early 30s is good too!
But really @Ross… @Eddies way sounds like a good plan… At the risk of being friend zoned… Can’t you be friends first then do the seduction later? I’ve always wanted to ask this.
@Ebene
No.
Dear Ross,
Want to thank you for publishing “He Planned To Approach 100 Women!” article.
I have just woke this morning with a different approach to life and to women. At 10am i arrived in the university to request some legal documentation for 2 friends that asked me to do that as a favor since they could not due to job schedule.
I was just waiting my turn in a row of about 20 persons ahead of me and 5 behind, listening some music with my iPod. Suddenly this cute, angel-faced girl approach the waiting line and asked somebody behind me for information. Fortunately for me that person could not answer and she just turned to me to ask. I replied in a gentle manner and then she went to the last place in the row since she was the last person to arrive.
After a couple of minutes i realized she is just behind me. I remembered the post about approaching 100 women published in Ross blog and said to myself, what the heck, why don’t you give it a try! She ain’t gonna bite you.
I turned my body half way toward her and came with this opener about how she did to skip five persons in the row, she got surprised about the question and nervously replied that those five people behind me did not have all the requirements needed to apply for the legal documents and that they decided to quit the line therefore.
Then after saying me that she just laughed because i was kind of accusing her of skipping turns in a waiting line (an action that is very common here in my country by the way). Then we talked for about 15 minutes of several issues but she was sending these body language signals that i was sooo ashtonished: she was grabbing and combing her long very black hair with her fingers (she did that for about 5 minutes)…i catched her twice looking at my lips, etc.
During the conversation she told me she is a teacher and i told her about this program which is searching graduated people in several fields to train them and turn them into bilingual teachers in Texas (in which i am applying by the way). She told me her sister is a freaky English lover and that she could be interested. Well, i said, give me your email address and i can send you the info. She did not doubted a second and even grabbed a pen out of her purse and wrote down her email in a piece of paper i handled her.
Then she just realized she has to photocopy some other document and left the line for about 5 minutes. I took my time to send her the info from my smartphone. When she came back to the line, she told: hey you are really fast sending things, i have just received your email. And she show me the message in her phone which happened to be a Blackberry. I said: oh! you have a BB too, give me your PIN in case your sister needs to clarify some info. She told: give me yours and i send you the messenger invitation.
Five minutes then we were both set with another contact alternative. Finally we submitted our requests in the university and i told her i was in my way to the subway station and it happened she was going there too, so she said: well, i can use some company! We keep on talking and when the time came to take each one different ways, we say goodbye to each other and she finally said: please keep in touch soon!
Life is so freaky… I had the chance to ask her if she is were going to spend the entire weekend by her sister before going back home which is 200 miles away. She told yes and my next step is to write and ask her out this friday night.
Not too bad taking into account i have just read Ross post yesterday.
Ross…keep up the great work!!!
@Luis
Good to see you are making it count and doing something with it! RJ
Excellent Steve. I met this Italian chick in Starbucks yesterday but I wasn’t ‘ready’ – since I want to be ‘perfect’ before I try. WHAT A HOGWASH. The guy who wrote about 100 approaches just enlightened me terribly now, I will go out and have some fun – so I will not feel scared.